In last week’s newsletter, we discussed the idea of redefining failure and how it can be used to leverage success. We also looked at failure as an event vs. failure as an identity and how the psychology of failure can impact our emotions and mindset. This week, we’ll look at practical strategies for embracing failure as a tool for growth and its long-term benefits.
Practical Strategies for Embracing Failure
One of the first things you can do is reframe failure. Instead of seeing it as a negative, start viewing it as a chance for growth. Here are some practical ways to do just that:
Reframe Failure
- Remove any personal association you feel from the failed event, step back, and look at it objectively.
- Every situation you encounter provides feedback of some sort, so take that feedback, adjust as needed, and reiterate.
- Sometimes, it may mean trying again and pushing through until you achieve the desired result. Other circumstances may require you to pivot and try something a little different or completely new.
- Never accept failure as defeat and wear it as a crown to display your inadequacies.
- Instead of using negative self-talk to narrate the story of your life, such as “I can’t make this work,” “I’m not good enough,” or “I might as well give up.” Start using positive self-talk, “How can I make this work?” “I may not have succeeded this time, or yet,” and “Let me try this again.”
- Everything can be traced back to mindset.
- How you think and feel is all that really matters.
Many people have failed and never made it back to the top. Still, others have failed time and time again, lost everything, but still find themselves back at the top—the only difference…mindset.
Rather than believing the lie that YOU are a failure, take time to learn from the situation. Journal or reflect on the event and the outcome. Objectively look at what worked and what didn’t and remove yourself from the equation. Of course, by this, I mean emotionally; you still have to understand the hand you played and how you can change that in the future.
Seek Guidance
The next step is to seek guidance or outside feedback if necessary.
- If you’re at work and fail spectacularly:
- Be bold enough to own the failure
- Take responsibility for it, and then ask for guidance.
- Speak to the people who can help you overcome obstacles and potentially help you do better next time.
- Dealing with failure in life in general, maybe you feel like your relationships are falling apart, or you have deep emotional wounds or trauma you can’t get over.
- Seek professional help.
- Speak to a therapist or psychologist and begin to work through those issues.
One of our biggest hangups as human beings is thinking that we’re alone and that we have to figure everything out alone. It’s hard to ask for help. Setting down your pride because you think it makes you look weak is a difficult thing to do. However, the sooner you learn to do this, the better your life becomes.
Much of this comes from the conception that if you do this, let your guard down, and ask for help or assistance, you’re incompetent. You’re weak. You don’t have what it takes. Unfortunately, this false belief only causes more issues in your life.
Some of the most influential people to ever walk the planet had mentors who helped them develop and grow into the people we know today.
Another strategy for embracing failure is to stop looking for and requiring perfection. Perfection is unattainable, and there will always be something else to adjust or change. Instead, focus on progress not perfection. Focus on each small step, and when you do, you’ll realize you’ve gone much further than if you had been looking for perfection.
The Long-Term Benefits of Embracing Failure
One of the significant shifts I had to undergo was learning to play the long game. I was primarily focused on getting immediate results, but it wasn’t until I started playing the long game that life slowed down and got a little easier.
This is mainly due to the fact that playing the long game requires you to embrace failure instead of running from immediate result to immediate result. However, this requires a paradigm shift. It requires you to adopt an infinite game mindset, which I wrote about a couple of weeks ago in my article The Infinite Game: How to Create Impact That Lasts for Generations.
As I said, one of the results was that life got easier; I began to feel a more profound sense of freedom and less worry. The failures I was experiencing and would continue to experience in life weren’t as daunting as they used to be. My anxiety lessened because my perspective had shifted to long-term thinking instead of needing perfection and having everything right now.
When you embrace failure, your creativity begins to expand. Part of the reason is that if you ask, “How can I make this work?” rather than stating, “I can’t make this work,” your mind begins searching for new and different ways to tackle the problem. You understand that failure is a trial-and-error process. Sometimes, things will work in your favor, and sometimes they won’t. That’s OKAY!
We wouldn’t have Post-it Notes if it weren’t for failure. All our modern technologies wouldn’t exist if it weren’t for failure. We wouldn’t live in the society we live in if it weren’t for failure. Everything we have in life was built on failure at some point or another.
“Don’t ever quit when things get hard or don’t go as planned. It’s our failure that allows us to adapt, reiterate, and continue on with something better than we previously imagined.” – Josiah Thibodeau
Embracing failure means you are developing mental toughness. It’s what develops growth and wisdom within you. You gain more confidence each time you fail and bounce back. Failure provides invaluable lessons that teach flexibility, resilience, and a deeper self-awareness.
The more you embrace failure, the more success you can realize in your life. Remember, as Edison stated, he didn’t fail; he just found TEN THOUSAND ways not to do something! Each attempt took time and effort, tweaking and adjusting before he tried again, only to fail again. What we often fail to recognize, though, is that failure is what made Edison such a success and one of the wealthiest and most influential men of his day.
Don’t Forget to Celebrate
The next time you fail, celebrate!
It means you are learning and growing as an individual. Each failure is an opportunity to improve, and each improvement has the potential to incrementally improve your life and the lives of those around you.
So, fail often. Fail hard.
Allow yourself the grace to make mistakes, and in the words of Aaliyah’s 2000 hit song “Try Again,”…
And if, at first, you don’t succeed
Then dust yourself off and try again
You can dust it off and try again, try again
I never imagined using Aaliyah’s lyrics in my writing, yet here we are. Another pivotal learning moment, but guess what?! Girl was right!
Your Embracing Failure, Now What?
Continue on, young Padawan.
Remember to consistently reframe failure. YOU are not a failure; you may have failed, but you are not a failure.
Realize the importance of failure in learning to grow, adapt, foster creativity, and develop resilience and wisdom. Understand that failure is not an endpoint but rather a transformation process one must undergo to achieve success and fulfillment.
It’s the opportunity to embrace risks and accept challenges that cause you to grow instead of hiding away in fear, hoping, wishing, and praying things will work out.
Failure isn’t the end—it’s the foundation for the life you’re meant to create. The question is, will you accept a little failure in your life to create this mosaic that otherwise can’t be created without failure?
I hope this writing encourages you to begin embracing failure in ways you hadn’t thought about before. If so, please consider sharing this with your friends or network. As always, thank you for reading. I hope you have a great day!
Josiah