When it comes to the various emotions we feel, it can seem as if some of them are not beneficial, don’t belong, or shouldn’t be a part of the human experience. However, emotions in and of themselves are not bad. It’s our misunderstanding or misuse of emotions that allows them to take a negative toll on our lives. One of these emotions is anxiety. Anxiety tends to have a stranglehold on many people, and it can be challenging to bring it under control. That’s why today we are going to look at how to break the cycle of anxiety in your life so you can find freedom for yourself moving forward.
Anxiety is something I struggled with for a long time, along with depression, and they sort of fed off each other, keeping me trapped in a loop I couldn’t seem to break free from.
If this is something you deal with, you might think anxiety is bad, but what you have to understand is that anxiety isn’t bad. Anxiety is a natural part of existence and is a natural stress response. It makes you aware of perceived danger, allowing you to turn on the fight or flight response.
The problem in our modern world is that we generally don’t need the fight or flight response turned on like we might have in the past. Sure, there are situations where it’s needed, but sitting amongst a group of people at work, about to give a presentation, shouldn’t elicit the fight or flight response to the degree where you feel debilitated.
Understanding the Cycle of Anxiety
If you want to overcome anxiety, you must understand the cycle of anxiety in your life. The American Psychological Association defines anxiety as follows:
“Anxiety is an emotion characterized by feelings of tension, worried thoughts, and physical changes like increased blood pressure.
Anxiety is not the same as fear, but they are often used interchangeably. Anxiety is considered a future-oriented, long-acting response broadly focused on a diffuse threat, whereas fear is an appropriate, present-oriented, and short-lived response to a clearly identifiable and specific threat.”
Mild anxiety might be helpful in certain situations, such as preparing for a presentation or an upcoming event where you need to perform a specific way, whether speaking in front of your work crew, a sporting event, etc. There’s a bit of worry, nervousness, or unease about what you’re about to head into, but it quickly passes once the experience occurs.
Chronic anxiety, on the other hand, begins to disrupt your daily life in a way that leaves you feeling debilitated and unable to take the steps needed to move forward appropriately.
One of the things to understand is that everyone feels anxiety now and then, and that’s perfectly acceptable. It’s when anxiety begins to rule your life that you want to start taking action so that you can own your life instead of being owned by a feeling you can’t seem to shake.
Anxiety Cycles
The cycle of anxiety, like many emotions, can begin to feed on itself if you let it. In doing so, it creates a loop that slowly takes control of your life, and before you know it, you feel anxious about many things that used to never really bother you.
Generally, there’s a trigger, whether internal or external, that generates either the thought that creates the feeling of anxiety or triggers the feeling, which in turn generates a thought that creates a feedback loop reinforcing the feeling.
I’ve discussed negative feedback loops in multiple articles, but you can find more information HERE.
Not only will you create a feedback loop, but your body also generates physical symptoms from the emotions. While dealing with anxiety, you may experience a racing heart, sweaty palms, or an uneasiness in your chest or stomach.
As mentioned, when you begin to FEEL the feelings of anxiety, it reinforces the thought cycle, strengthening the physical sensations, causing you to feel more anxious, which causes you to think more thoughts along the lines of “something being wrong.”
When you get caught up in this cycle, breaking it might feel impossible unless you excuse yourself from the situation. In some cases, that works, but in others, you simply can’t. So, how can you go about breaking the cycle of anxiety so that you can live your life?
Why Mindset Matters
The truth of the matter is anyone can overcome this negative cycle of anxiety. The question is, what are you willing to do to start making the change today?
Understanding that you can overcome is one of the first steps you need to take, believing it’s possible. Shifting your mindset is one of the ways you can introduce a pattern interrupt.
This allows you to change how you react to various triggers, which, in turn, can break the negative feedback loop. The more you do this, the easier it is to overcome anxiety.
As Dr. Joe Dispenza states, you have to become aware of your unconscious thoughts.
Carl Jung said:
“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life, and you will call it fate.”
– Carl Jung
Going through this process means opening yourself up to anxiety. It means allowing yourself to feel it, but at the same time, take a step back and view it in real-time. In other words, become conscious of what’s happening and why.
What many people do is just go with the flow.
When an event happens, something triggers the anxiety within you, and instead of stopping to question what’s wrong or why it’s flaring, you give in to it and then try to escape the situation to relieve the mounting pressure.
If, instead, you take a moment to acknowledge what’s happening, look at it for what it is, and then move forward with the knowledge that you feel anxious and you know why, it can help you get a handle on the situation so it doesn’t steamroll you into oblivion.
Overcoming the Cycle of Anxiety
You may feel as if you’ll never be able to conquer anxiety. It’s just something you’ll have to live with and deal with for the rest of your life. But I can tell you from firsthand experience this doesn’t have to be the case.
It’s not that I don’t deal with anxiety because I still have moments when I feel anxious about certain situations; we all do. No one is immune from this. It comes down to understanding what it is, what’s causing it, and that you may not be able to control outside events, but you can learn to control yourself.
I remember doing an event a few years ago where I was speaking in front of a group of people, and it had been a while since I had done anything like that. I felt fine until I entered the room where I would be speaking.
Suddenly, a tiny spark of anxiety was set off within me.
I was there early to help set up and ensure the guests had everything they needed before we started the event. Several other speakers were scheduled to speak before me, and as I sat and waited, my anxiety began to build.
However, I had been practicing this idea of managing anxiety and learning how to overcome the cycle of anxiety in my life. So, from the time I arrived to when I stood to speak, I kept reminding myself that I couldn’t control anything Out There. The only control I have is what’s going on within me.
I had to repeatedly bring myself to a place of stillness over and over again. Eventually, I gave my presentation, and it all went well. Nobody attacked me, no one stood up and screamed in my face, and the entire group didn’t march out the door in disgust. They simply clapped, and the event moved on. The anxiety I felt was unfounded.
The following few events I spoke at went swimmingly well without a sense of the anxiety I felt at the first event, but it’s because I was willing to confront the emotion head-on.
However, there were specific steps I had been taking over the course of a couple of years to help me learn how to manage anxiety. Let’s look at a couple of those now.
Step 1: Recognizing the Triggers
If you want to break the cycle of anxiety, you must understand the triggers causing it. These could be caused by internal thoughts and feelings or external activities or situations.
Common Anxiety Triggers and Manifestations
- Social Triggers: Fear of judgment, rejection, public humiliation because of a perceived failure, or meeting new people
- Situational Triggers: Deadlines, financial stress, health concerns, or a traumatic event
- Physical Triggers: Increased heart rate, shallow breathing, sleep issues, unhealthy eating habits, or constant negative thinking
Creating Change
- Note when you feel anxious: Become aware, allow yourself to feel it, step outside of it, and recognize what triggered the feeling.
- Keep a journal and write down your experience. What caused you to feel anxious, what happened when you recognized it, how did the experience play out regarding the specific situation you found yourself in, and what were the resulting thoughts or physical sensations?
One of the best things you can do is constantly remind yourself that you can overcome. It might take work, but you can absolutely become free of anxiety.
Step 2: Interrupting the Loop
Anxiety can be one of those things that love to feed off itself. The more anxious you feel, the more you think about feeling anxious, and it perpetuates the feeling to the point where you feel like you have completely lost control. This can result in panic attacks if you don’t learn to manage your thoughts and feelings.
Your mind will exaggerate the scenario and send you into the spiraling question of “what-if.” This spiral keeps you stuck, perceiving a threat that usually isn’t founded. Why isn’t it founded? Because you’re making it up as you go.
Learning to break the negative feedback loop of anxiety can be oh-so rewarding because you no longer feel like a slave to the thoughts and physical sensations created by anxiety.
Strategies to Interrupt the Cycle of Anxiety
- If you feel anxiety ramping up before you even get to the “event,” allow yourself to feel it in a controlled setting, as mentioned earlier.
- Example: You’re about to go into a meeting. Allow yourself to feel the anxiety, and then step outside of it. Look at why you’re feeling anxious and what’s causing the sensation. Understand that you can only control yourself, not other people or the situation. Let yourself know you’re okay and not in any real danger.
- From there, do the following:
- Breathing Exercise: Take nice deep breaths through the diaphragm.
- You can do something like box breathing (Inhale for 4, hold for 4, exhale for 4, hold for 4, repeat)
- Or try a lengthened breath, one of my favorites (watch the second hand on a clock, or open up your phone and use the stopwatch feature and count as you breathe in slowly for 6 – 10 seconds, and then exhale for 6 – 10 seconds. Do this for about 5 minutes)
- Grounding Techniques: Use the “5-4-3-2-1” method
- Name 5 things you see, 4 things you can touch, 3 things you hear, 2 things you smell, and 1 thing you taste.
- Physical Movement: Do some sort of physical activity
- Brisk walk outdoors
- Stretching
- Light workout
- Breathing Exercises
Wrapping Up
Many of the emotions we deal with regularly are nothing to scoff at. In today’s age, many of us have not been exposed to the same types of stressors our predecessors had to deal with. Many people around the world still deal with those issues, but living in America has provided certain freedoms that prevent us from enduring particular ordeals that would create the mental toughness or discipline, allowing us to stand free and clear of some of these emotions.
That doesn’t mean other emotions wouldn’t bind you, but such is life. The question, then, isn’t about which emotion is most detrimental, or would things be different in another setting, or what would life be like if you didn’t struggle with (list your issue here).
Instead, the question should be, regardless of the life you live or the time period or location in which you live it, how can you develop the mindset to be free from any emotion that might try to overwhelm you?
How can you live a life so free that you embody the essence of peace, joy, and love?
Because, when it comes down to it, this is all you want. All your striving, grinding away, and toiling to work and live a life you enjoy really comes down to wanting to feel peaceful, enjoy your life, and love your people.
Everyone wants that; we just go about it in different ways. We all think that if we do X, “I will finally reach what I hope to accomplish or achieve! I’ll be happy once I make $50k, $100k, or $1M. I’ll have peace and joy in my life.” So, we struggle to attain that monetary value that we think will bring us the emotional equivalent.
Maybe it’s once you build your dream home, retire, move to another city or location, graduate college, change your career, etc.
Whatever it is, most people are generally looking outside of themselves to experience the peace, joy, and love they so desire. It’s from this that you begin to experience the “negative” emotions you don’t want to experience.
When you can understand that you can have peace, joy, and love today, regardless of where you are in life, that’s when your life begins to change.
I hope you enjoyed this article. Be sure to share with your family, friends, and network so that together, we can work to make the world a better place.
Josiah
